#375 Back To The Obvious

 

Back To The Obvious

That should be that isn’t

So many make, or try to make things complicated and hard to follow and I guess in their eyes it makes them look good. Oh! And this is not a rant on this topic, this time it’s just an observation.

This topic, Back to the obvious is about the thing we forget and is hiding in plain sight.

I have seen it many times and one example of being brave was when my son, Joseph, went to an NLP seminar to see one of the originators of NLP, and what happened was   …….. You know the thing it’s a podcast and you will have to press play and listen. But it made a lasting impression on me.

Similarly, when I have had my doubts serendipity has stepped in on a similar vain – Yes Again, You know the thing it’s a podcast and you will have to press play and listen.

I guess you’re getting the picture, loud and clear

After you have listened and enjoyed the sharing please feel free to pay it forward and share to 3 more

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Shine brightly

Paul

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And the transcript WARNING if you’re a lover of the written word this may make you frustrated, or angry – you have been warned – is it an ‘ism

Personal development unplugged podcast where we use hypnosis

Hey, the longer podcast. A longer podcast. The one of many. Hey, and this one is, the title says it all, doesn’t it?

 

 

Cloughie: How often do you consider the basics

 

Back to the obvious, if you know what the obvious is. And I, think what I’m going to be saying. Things like, the shiny stuff doesn’t really work that well, and it doesn’t certainly last that well. But what do I mean by shiny stuff? Well, let’s go back to the beginning, because the beginning is where all things start. How often do you consider the basics? What are you talking about, Cloughie? I mean, practicing the basics. Practicing the basics of the skills that you’ve already learnt, because you had to learn them in progression, baby steps, until you got them in the muscle. We used to call when we taught NLP, or when I used to teach NLP, getting those skills in the muscles so they become natural unconscious. And I’m even thinking now, the skills you learnt of being you, maybe what brought this to me a long time ago was my son Joseph and I went all the way to Edinburgh for a It wasn’t class as an NLP, training, but it was. And it was Richard Bandler. Richard Bandler was taken. Richard Bandler is one of the co creators of NLP, along with John Grinder. But this was Richard Bandler’s gig. He’d called it something else, but it was basically NLP under a different name. And we were going through the days and to be honest, Joseph and I weren’t getting an awful lot out of this, seen a lot of it, okay. We were well into NLP. So a lot of the things we were being taught we really did know and we were training it. But what happens in these trainings, certainly in origin, bandler training, he would take someone from the audience and solve their issue on the stage right there. Right then, without knowing anything about it, he would just put his hand, people would, would put requests into, on a piece of paper, in a box. He’d put his hand out his box. Have a quick read. Yeah, this will do. This is a good one. And he was working with this guy. And to be fair, the things he was doing weren’t really cutting it, they weren’t getting there, they weren’t getting that change that he wanted. And after about half an hour, 40 minutes of really cracking it and not cracking it, he stopped and turned to us in the audience and said, would it be okay if I go back to the basics of NRP? And Joe and I thought, what do you mean go back? He said, I’m just going to use the basics of NRP. And he did the things that we were teaching, he did the processes that we were teaching and had been taught right at the very beginning, the very basics. And you know what? He smashed that problem. That guy from being supersonically depressed in front of us was a different man. And that 1st 40 minutes was a drag. The next 25 minutes was absolutely magical. It wasn’t magic, but it was magical. And the thing is, we teach the basics because the foundations, they are the foundations because they work and they work simply. And that’s why I really go back into in simplicity, there’s genius, because it is that. Genius is the thing that holds all our things together. And the thing is, I get reminders of this. I obviously got that reminder from Richard Bandler. Keep the basics, keep doing the basics. And then every now and again a book will come along. I told you before, things were happening. And all of a sudden I found this book online about the early days of NLP and how those foundations were, in those days, the great big things, and they just bloody work, so why change them? And then I’d see a video along the line, I’d just be doing something and then a video would come along and I go, it’s a classic. And I’m thinking, that still works. Still works because the process works. And the intention is there. The intention from either, the therapist? Well, both the therapist and the client. You see, I heard this and this seemed to again, come back to this. A teacher makes complicated things simple. so a teacher makes complicated things simple where others, and this was called like a guru. But the people who put themselves up to be gurus try to make the simple complicated. And m it does and they do, don’t they? I’ve been moaning about this forever. People making things so complicated and then calling them their own, and they’re not. And you have to question their intention. Now think of this. You go to the gym. We know when we go to the gym, if we do the basics right, we do the technique as best as we can. It’ll generally keep you free from injury unless you do too much of a weight or something like that. But if you keep the right technique, the really basic of that technique, you will lift or do, better things than you could before. And you just get stronger. And you get stronger without injury. And that gives you more confidence and thinking of things like our own skills, our personal development. We don’t get injured. We want to come stronger inside, become more confident inside with inner strength, which means using the basics in our mind, the things that we’ve learned. Now, I know this happens, and it happened to me right at the very beginning of my little bit of NLP. And it happens to everybody who seems to want to learn it. To start off with, we tend to rush for the hacks. Now, this is not just NLP. Now you see it on YouTube. The quickest hack. Hack this, hack this, hack every bloody thing. It’s a quick fix. People come and ask when they come on a training m. Oh, please, teach me the shiny techniques, those little things. No, you see, if you just know techniques, but you haven’t got any basics. If something goes wrong, you haven’t got a bloody clue what to do, because you just know the shiny bits you don’t know what makes it shine, and you don’t know how to add shiny bits together to link them, to move them. And this can be inside you too, you see, without the balance of sound foundations, when things don’t go the way you really thought they would, you can find a way. You see, I can remember seeing my middle son, Luke. He’s now a professional magician and a hypnotherapist, so he plays with people’s minds in all sorts of ways. But before he became a member of the magic circle, he would practice the simple things over and over again, making this one card come to the top, one card into the pack come to the top, go behind his hand, just over and over again so he could do it without even looking. He literally got it into the muscles. And what about you? Us, me? Do we do that? Do we practice those foundations? Do we practice the simple things that they become so natural?

 

 

We need to get those basics. We talk about baby steps and some people don’t like the term

 

I wonder, something to think about. This is always in this podcast. It’s to muse and consider and reflect and then see how we can use those reflections, because we’ll also even look at people and go, oh, thing is, you can do that because you’re a natural, but you’re seeing their shiny, real, their best reel. Like when you see Luke with his magic, you go, it’s a natural. But I saw him practice and practice and practice just the small basics behind the scenes. And it’s an intentional practice. It’s not just, boring practice, it’s with intention to get it under control, put it in the muscle, do exactly what you, want when you want it, know what you’re doing, doing what you know. And it just happens that way because you get it in the muscle, you get it at an unconscious level. And then when you become conscious and unconscious, when you know what you’re doing and doing what you know, you’re a master, and you don’t have to master everything. You master what you know, doing what you do, knowing what you, knowing what you do too. But does it have to be hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours? Of course not. See what I’m going to share with you in a minute? You’re going to say, oh, cluffy for. That’s so obvious. That’s so obvious. Cloughie, I know that. An example. I want to get strong or I want to lose weight. So what I’m going to do is I’m going to go to the gym, but I’m only going to go once and I’m going to go eight to 10 hours straight. That’s it. I’m going to hammer it out. All that time, do we do that? Well, some people do try, don’t they? What happens to them? They get injured, they get damaged. It just doesn’t work. And they get so despondent about it, they don’t do it again because it’s not appropriate, is it, to do that? Not at all. And there’s no improvement when you do that. The only improvement is you’re very much aware of the aches and pains. And the thought was, I don’t want to do it anymore. Yes, I know. Sometimes we go to the gym and we have to push ourselves to our new personal best, but we don’t do it every day. We need to get those basics. And don’t we do similar things in different contexts? And sometimes we just don’t do anything and wonder why things don’t change. Some things, we just keep doing the same thing, over and over again and wonder why things don’t change because of the way we’re doing things. Or could we? Do you see, when I say over and over again, you might again. Sit down. I want to play the guitar. I want to play the guitar for an, hour and a half every day. Haven’t played yet, but I want to play an hour and a half every day. I know when I did that, my fingers of my left hand were raw, pushing those strings down. They were like a cheese grater on my hand. Crazy. Did I enjoy it? Not a bit. Did I get better? No, I got worse through that period of time. When I came back to it, did I get better? No, I was frightened of it. I didn’t get any confidence out of that. Now, you know that. You do know that because you’re going to say cluffy. I know that. It’s obvious. But what we could do, what we could do is just enough, and that’s not just enough as an excuse, it’s just enough to keep growing. We talk about baby steps and some people, I understand don’t like the term. I’m doing baby steps. And they use that voice, by the way. They did baby steps. I’ll call them little steps, little increments that makes it better for you because they’re the steps that keep your interest. If they’re too big, you get overwhelmed, you give up. But if you can have that goal in mind and the intention that what you expect to have happened, what you anticipate achieving and, what you want to have happen, you get that feeling of the wish fulfilled. And you put that into that step, each step slowly in pace for each session, and you begin to get your technique in the muscle. You begin to hone that way. And when that technique does get in the muscle, it becomes unconscious. And, what we can do is, it’s the old 80 20% principle, but the other way around, we practice those basics 80% of that time, even if it’s a short amount of time, and then do 20% new. And then you review where you are at the end of the week, and then you rinse and repeat, do it again, because you’ll find even they think, well, I’m only doing the same 80%, but you’re not. That 80% of those things that are in your muscle now are growing. You’ve got more techniques, you’re better at it, so you get quicker at that, and you then do something new. And that new then becomes part of the 80%. And when you do look back and, we’ve talked about this before, look back to when you first started those sore fingers or whatever it was, you’ll realize that this 80% you’re doing now is so, much more surpasses that previous 80% by double. And that’s a great thing. So then now we get stronger, we get more motivated, our self esteem gets higher.

 

 

Take responsibility for your personal development by reviewing where you are

 

Now, imagine applying it to your personal development. What are the things we want to do? Well, what do I know? Well, I got to have that goal in mind. I’ve got to be to see it, to see what I’ll see, to hear what I’ll hear, what will it smell like, what it will taste and get that feeling. And I hold that feeling in my mind and in my body. Maybe I’m going to anchor it, because I know anchoring now, we talked about that before, and then we use it. We find the right place. We just create an environment that’s the best environment we can at that moment. If it’s not the best, it’s the best at that moment. We set our intention, all basics, and, when they’re not working, just have a look and go, oh, I’ve moved away a little bit. Let’s just go back. Now. If you did know that and you do it, that’s bloody awesome. But if you’re honest, we probably don’t not know it. That is, we do know it, but we don’t necessarily do it. or if we do know it and we do do it, we don’t probably do it as consistently. I say that again, without a little stuttering in the middle. We don’t do it consistently. And, it’s that consistence, that resilience, that determination that this is where we take responsibility. We talk about cause and effect. The cause is greater than the effect. Well, if you take responsibility to create that cause, you are, now going to be creating better effects. And it all comes from you. And when it comes from you, you get more motivated yourself again, the self esteem gets better, you feel that inner strength because you become the cause, the cause of those increasingly better effects. And when you do that, you won’t experience what we sometimes used to do in the past have. If, only I wish I’d. Can you think back? Or I wish I’d. Or only if I’d. If only I’d done that. I can remember thinking if I had practiced that guitar just for ten minutes every day for that last year, I’d be pretty good by now. But I didn’t. I wish I did. And, I know this stuff and this is what I’m saying, I know it. But do I do it or do it consistently enough? No. And I think we need to do when we’re doing those things when we’ve talked about before, by just reviewing where we are, reviewing what we want, making sure these are things we do, and then scheduling them out, taking responsibility and creating that life we want. So this could be for anything outside your life, the things that you want to do, the skills you want to learn, but also about yourself, working on yourself. And when you get there and you know you’ve got no regrets now. No regrets of. Only if I wish. If only I wish. Those regrets are gone now you can start looking back and going, now I know where I am and where I’ve gone or come from. And now where I am right now, what else can I do? Because if I could do that, I can do anything. It’s like people who will go through my son’s, Joseph’s, mind mastery, getting rid of fears and anxiety, and we say to them, you’ve gone through that in a matter of weeks. What can you do now? Because you did that. You’ve gone through that course all by yourself. Well, not by yourself, though, supported by us. But you had to take responsibility to do all the work. You did it. You created this wonderful change in yourself. Now what could you do? What else? Because if you can do that, that’s probably the hardest thing they could do. Now anything else becomes a breeze. And, I think when we do that, the one thing that we do, I just made a little note here, for goodness sake. Celebrate, celebrate every success. Doesn’t matter how small that success is, how big it is, especially sometimes it’s small. We go, oh, well, that’s not yet, no, celebrate, celebrate big time. It could be big time. Just for 5 seconds. Yeah, I feel so good about that. Because you are now telling your unconscious mind, this is it. Forget ah, the bloody shiny stuff. I know it doesn’t last. I know it doesn’t work because the results are down to me. Yeah. How do I want to feel about this? I want you to feel, do you know? Yeah. It’s time to put things right. It’s time to create the stuff I want because I’ve got it in me. And this is how you get there. There’ll be more of this, I know. On the longer podcast we’ll carry on doing how to learn skills, how to put them in the muscle, some processes to let go of the negative, emotions or beliefs you have to stop you getting there. But this is part of the foundation. So, ah, maybe just review the things, you know, and then review do I use them? And how can you schedule in, continue using them and those the things you don’t use. And remember, just be honest with yourself because can’t kill a kidder and you can’t kid yourself, you know.

 

 

You can start creating massive change by just doing small baby steps

 

So let’s just take a moment or two while we’re reviewing from the last podcast. Let’s go back to the basics, back to the obvious, and start creating massive change by just doing those small baby steps, those little increments. And it doesn’t matter where you are, how far you’ve come, there’s still new increments to do to have lasting richness in your life. And in that way, I think you affect others. Well, I know you do, because you are actually being the change you want to be in yourself and see in yourself. But you’re also being a change that you can see in others, because you are now the shining example. Just by doing it. People will see you, they’ll notice you, they may even come and ask you questions, they may even ask you to mentor them in a roundabout way. Ask for advice and you’ll know the basics and you can teach it. You can share them, share everything you learn then, because you’ve got it in your muscle. And one muscle you could use is to share this podcast, share it with everyone you know, and also get that little finger on that subscribe button. There are two muscles you need to work the sharing muscle, paying things forward, because that’s a good thing to do anyway. Just makes the world a better place. Share what you know, share the episode. If you would be very kind. And if there’s anything you want to know, or if there’s things in here. Do you know what? Cluffy didn’t quite get that.

 

Or.

 

It’s all very well, you’re talking this way, but I’ve got this issue and, I don’t know how to get over it. Send me that email. Few bullet points. How am I feeling right now? And how do I want to feel? And maybe a few little triggers, but they’re the two things. How do you want to feel? And how do you feel right now? How do you do the things you do right now? And how do you feel? How do you want to feel? And we’ll find a way. Feedback at personal developmentunplug.com simple email and we’ll work out something together. I know we will, because that’s what we’re doing here. Ah. We’re sharing our experiences and sharing the things we know that make a difference. It’s all about sharing, and it’s a good thing to do. It’s a kind thing to do, isn’t it? So, my friend, it’s been very kind of you to spare your time with me. Hope you enjoyed it. Hope I communicated it in a way that it’s hopefully a little bit inspiring and it gets you to do the things that you know you can do and excel beyond your imagination. There you go.

 

 

Personal development unplugged. It’s time to fly on your own

 

So, until next time, my friend. You, that is. It’s time to fly.

 

Warning. You are now leaving the unplugged mind of Paul Clough. It’s time to fly on your own. Be brave, my friend.

 

Personal development unplugged.