Healing From Emotional Wounds
Healing Negative Emotions
In this extended episode, Paul Clough tackles the persistent negative emotions that many of us struggle with – those emotional wounds from our past that seem to linger despite our best efforts to move on.
Episode Highlights
- Paul introduces a gentle process for resolving emotional wounds that doesn’t involve regression therapy
- Important safety note: For deep trauma or abuse issues, Paul strongly recommends working with a professional therapist
- Why negative emotions persist: Our unconscious mind is still running old protection programs from our younger self
- The goal: Teaching our unconscious mind that we have more resources and wisdom now than we did back then
The Process
- Identify what resources you needed back then that you have now
- Confidence, calmness, curiosity, love, or simply knowing “this too shall pass”
- Connect with memories when you’ve felt these positive emotions
- The Inner Child Healing Exercise
- Identify when you first felt this negative emotion (often before age 10)
- Visualize your younger self on a stage in front of you
- Send the specific resources, emotions, and healing they needed
- Integrate your younger self with your current self, accessing all your wisdom and resources
Additional Support
If you’re still experiencing negative emotions after trying this process, Paul suggests:
- Working with a therapist skilled in NLP, timeline therapy, and hypnosis
- Asking yourself: “What am I doing that I could stop?” or “What am I not doing that I could start?”
- Reaching out directly to Paul at feedback@personaldevelopmentunplugged.com
Remember, even subtle shifts can create profound change. The key is recognizing that you have access to all your experiences, wisdom, and positive emotions right now.
And remember to share this episode because that would be really kind and most appreciated:
https://personaldevelopmentunplugged.com/439-healing-from-emotional-wounds/
Shine Brightly 🌟
Paul
Hey there! I’d love to hear from you—questions, feedback, requests—all welcome. Drop me a line or leave a comment. If you’ve enjoyed this episode or any other, please share and subscribe! You can reach me at feedback@personaldevelopmentunplugged.com.
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Remember: I’m a therapist, but I’m not your therapist. This podcast and any of my online resources are for educational purposes only. Never use the hypnosis tracks or exercises if you’re operating machinery, driving, or if you have epilepsy or psychiatric conditions. Always consult a healthcare provider if you’re unsure.
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Music Credits
Music by Wataboi, DreamHeaven, ccjmusic, and others from Pixabay.
And the transcript WARNING if you’re a lover of the written word this may make you frustrated, or angry – you have been warned – is it an ‘ism
Welcome to the longer podcast about negative emotions
Welcome to the longer podcast. And we’re on about negative emotions again. And some people might call this emotional wounds or simply growing up, maybe a little bit of trauma, but not a lot. That’s what we’re doing it for. It’s for. I’m still feeling this negative emotion. Should have gone by now, yeah it’s still there. Maybe it’s a little bit of hurt, maybe it’s grief, maybe sometimes it’s anger, sometimes it’s just bloody. Hurt. That’s all it is. And sometimes you can’t even put a label on it. You just know it’s there, maybe it’s shame. There’s all that stuff. So that’s where we’re going toa go. So it’s Paul, by the way, paul from Personal Development Unplugged. And this is a longer episode where we can dive a little bit deeper in a process, making a process really simple, simple to understand and simple to do it. But it just takes intention that will to do whatever it takes. So if you do have a feeling, and in the previous podcast we were all about pushing it further away, weren’t we? Pushing it further away, getting it smaller, getting it darker. So you get dissociated and you get distance from it. And when you get distance from it, the emotion disappears and gives you space to see what you need to do. But sometimes it’s something you think of maybe was caused a long time ago and it still hasn’t gone.
Do not go for regression when dealing with deep trauma, say abuse
Now I want to give you a warning. It’s a nice warning. Because if you’re dealing with something which is, you know, pretty deep and you know it might be quite upsetting, then don’t do this. You can listen to it, but don’t do it. Because if you’ve got something which is, say very much into trauma, maybe abuse and things like that, you really want to get professional help. Now I’m a therapist, but I’m not your therapist. And you, I would really advise getting one to one help, go and see somebody personally so they can guide you through processes, maybe a similar process to this. And you’ll have someone on hand to make sure that you’re completely safe. And when I say safe, you’re completely comfortable. And what I would say is if you do have anything that is still coming up from the past, goodness sake, I nearly swore, but it’s goodness sake, do not go for regression. That’s my advice. You see, I feel when you have true regression, and there are some therapies that do this, but personal opinion, I don’t like it. Because when you truly regress in a proper way, you go back to that time, but you go back to that time at the age you will, you become that age again. And to me, if you don’t learn anything from it, you just learn and reaffirm. It was a shitty place to be. It did hurt, and it’s still there now. We don’t do things like that. And my therapy, the therapy that I’ve learned, we do not do that at all. It’s all about learning from the event at the unconscious level, training your unconscious mind to find better resources than what it’s doing now. And the only reason you have this hurt, this negative emotion, is because we haven’t finally learned the last few bits of it. And your unconscious mind seems to miss out. All our wisdom, all our experience from way back then to now, it’s been doing the same thing, trying to protect you from that, Hurt. But then you have that direct conflict. And it’s easy to tell a direct conflict is cause it still bloody hurts. I still get a negative feeling by it. So it’s trying to protect me, but protect me from the very feeling that I’m feeling right now by having me feel that distance. I’ll feel that feeling. So we want to get distance, you see. So remember, if this is anything like trauma and what have you, please go and see a professional, professional therapist. I’ve got an FMQ somewhere, or I think it’s a longer podcast, I don’t know. That tells you what to expect from a therapist. But make sure that you really do feel comfortable with them and what they say before you say yes, okay, do your homework. Because if you find somebody who is really good at nlp, really good at timeline therapy, and have, master at hypnosis, you’re going to get resolved really quickly. See, all we need you to do is get distance. And on the previous podcast, I said, well, push it away, further away, looking through your own eyes. So you’re watching a movie of yourself, of that instance, that memory that you have going further away. But we’re not gonna do that, you see, because although that’s manageable and that’s a smaller thing, we want to educate our unconscious mind, our best friend, you see, what’s the reason this is important? Because we need to know the importance of this, you see, if you can show your unconscious Mind that you’re not that younger you, because that’s effectively what it’s doing. It is still working with a program that it did and had to protect you way back then. And it’s doing the same bloody thing. And it’s missed out or missing out all the wisdom, all the learnings, every bit of your experience from way back then to nowuse. Back then you had bugger all. You didn’t have a lot of experience, you didn’t have a lot of wisdom. Now, even if this thing happened a few years ago, generally you find the emotion first started though way back when you were younger. And what’s happened is you’ve held onto that emotion. It was small at the time, but it’s got bigger and bigger. And then you have that significant emotional event, that big thing you really remember right now. And you think that’s the cause of it. No, the cause is way back. Your unconscious mind just triggered that effect. That’s all it did. It just triggered what it was and it’s trying to protect you. So we need to ask questions of our unconscious mind. And we ask them in, a way that we’re asking questions of ourself because we’re the teacher here. We’re gonna teach our unconscious mind that you’re not that younger you and you have so much more. And you could start asking yourself a question like this, and I hope you’ve got a pen, paper, because these things are good to write down to remember. Then you can do the process again. And as you relisten this to this episode, you’d have that your notes and make it so much easier. And you’re going to start asking, I wonder, I wonder what did I need back then? What skill, what emotion? Maybe what better emotion could I’ve used back then that I have now? Because I’ve got it in abundance. So what learnings, what skills, what emotion did I need back then? Because I’m different than that now. I have so much more experience, so many more learning, so much more wisdom. What did I need back then? So maybe it could have been, I don’t know, confidence. And if you think about, well, yeah, maybe it was confidence. Not overconfident, but just that inner confidence. So you think back to times in your past, when you’ve had that inner confidence, pick one, go back there, go back into that memory where you had that inner confidence, look through your own eyes, see what you saw, then hear what you heard, and then feel that confidence and go, ah, yeah. If I’d have had this feeling, it would have been better. And maybe you could just imagine as you got that feeling, as you come back into the now again, looking through your own eyes, just send that. Imagine just sending that emotion of confidence back to a younger you of yours somewhere in your past. Cause you never know. You don’t know when that happened really. So just imagine sending it to a younger you. But what you’re doing is when you feel that feeling and you say to your unconscious mind, yeah, I think this would have been better. This is certainly a better feeling. If I took it into the future, it would be better than the feeling I have now. Okay, what else? And keep doing this. What else? What else did I need or could I have used back then? So maybe it was a calmness, maybe it was curiosity. Maybe sometimes it’s just love. That younger you, if it had love. Cause it maybe was feeling alone and it needs to feel loved. That feeling of love and a hug. And again, think of a time in the past when you felt that love or that curiosity or that energy or whatever you felt you need or you needed back then. It’s the only in your imagination. So don’t worry about it. Just ask the question, well, I wonder what it is and go with what comes up. And then go back to a time when you had that wonderful positive emotion. Go back into that one specific memory, See what you saw, hear what you heard and feel those feelings. And when you feel those feelings go, yeah, see your uncco comes mind. Yeah, this would have been better, wouldn’t it?
Imagine if I had this instead in the future. Wouldn’t that be brilliant
Imagine if I had this instead in the future. Cause that’s what we’re doing. Because the past has gone, by the way, doesn’t exist only in your mind. But if we. And the future doesn’t exist, but we can imagine in the future having these resources and noticing how much better, than they are than this negative emotion. And you keep going, and you keep going, keep asking yourself questions, maybe making a note of it, because it’s good to make a note ca Becausee once you start to do this, it’s like the gates start opening and your imagination and your wisdom, your learnings and your unconscious mind even starts to say, oh, what about this one? Then you, jeez, we’re all on it now. Yeah, Imagine a time when I had that. Yeah, what would it be like if I had that emotion now, now. And in the future use I have, I’ve got it in me. And you can imagine now a future with all these emotions. It would just overwhelm the old negative Emotion, wouldn’t it? The old negative emotion couldn’t exist because it doesn’t work as well as these new emotions. It imagine having like a recipe of all these emotions as one mixing together. Wouldn’t that be brilliant? Yeah. And sometimes there’s one emotion that seems to pass everybody by. And it’s just a feeling of knowing. Knowing this too shall pass. Because it does. Every issue you had in the past is now gone because you’re here, you’re alive you’re re breathing. So it makes sense to think if I can remember a time, even now, I know this will pass because the others have passed. And when I know that, goodness me, that feeling. If I took that feeling and just said I know this too shall pass, then that negative feeling cannot stay. Because now you’ve looked and ask what can I learn from this? What did I need back then? Is there one particular learning that I needed that I need now? Something that I could do different? And when you think in this way and you check in on that feeling again, you’ll notice it starts to dissipate. It starts to disappear. And then after a while you’ll probably notice. Maybe a few days. Oo, where’s that going? and then you’ll probably just forget of it. You’ll forget about it completely now. Because when you forget it, it’s your new normal. Your new normal is all. Well, it ‘accessing all the skills you have because that’s what you weren’t doing. You were only accessing the skills that you had back then. Even now. That’s it now. Now got a little exercise you could do? Well, it’s not an exercise. It’s a little process you could do which really sucight to can make you feel really good. Sometimes a bit tearful. So just be warned. But you could call this, I guess, a process of healing the inner child. But I don’t, I’t. Sometimes I don’t bite into the inner child, but a lot of people do. So I’m happy for calling it Healing of the Inner Child. Or simply see it as a program that you’re still running from. A long time ago, and it was a younger you and you’re still basically acting and being that younger you when you come to these situations. So whatever feeling you’re experiencing, you need to just ask yourself, go into that feeling gently. Don’t want it. A 10 out of 10, 10 being the worst, 0 being 0, you know, a 5 out of 10 just go into that feeling. Notice where it resides in your body. And just ask yourself, I wonder what age, what age was I when I decided to first feel this emotion? Remember I said you this significant emotional events, but way before that when you didn’t notice it was a significant emotional events, that’s when the cause was. And we deal with the cause and the effect which is now disappears and notice a number will come up and it’ll be probably before 10 and you’ll probably go, Whoa, what? Why did six come up? Why did three come up? Why did whatever number come up? And if it is after 10, fine, just double check caus it’s probably before, just say, well okay, I got fourteen again, that might be another significant event and go no, no, no. What age was I when I decided to first. The very first time I began to feel this emotion and notice what age comes up. And it’ll probably just be a number that comes into your mind, goes oh, four. Okay, cool. And that’s the number we’re goingna take. And what we’re going toa do is this, and only if it’s safe to do.
Imagine a stage below you and in front of you is that younger you
So I want you to close your eyes, close your eyes and imagine, imagine a stage, a stage out in front of you and below you. And on that stage below you and in front of you is that younger you, that younger you at that age that you said or that came to mind and she said she’s okay, he’s okay, just sitting or standing on that stage looking at you because I love you. And as you do that, maybe just say a few words with your internal voice. What you just know they need to hear, just for a few seconds how much you love them. Thank them for being here all this time, but just tell them it’s your turn now to help them. Yeah, I know this is a bit soppy, but trust me, just trust me. And as you do that, you’ll get a sense sense. What did they really need back then? What did they really need that younger year? What did that younger you need back then that you have now? And I’ll tell you what you have in abundance. So it might be that feeling, of confidence, calmness, curiosity, love. Whatever it is, just feel it. Just feel that feeling and imagine beaming it to that younger you down there on that stage. Imagine beaming all the energy of that one particular resource, that one emotion, that wonderful positive emotion. And as you do that, think again. I wonder what else, what else did you need back then? What did that younger you in front of me now need back then that I have in abundance. And maybe love comes to mind now and send that love to that younger you. Just imagine however you do it is perfect by the way. Just send that wonderful emotion of love, pure love to them. And notice, you might well notice now that they begin to change. Their facial expression begins to change, their breathing change. Change is. Just notice that. And just notice if there’s anything else, anything else that they needed back then. And if you get an intuitive understanding of that, send that feeling. Just m. Send it. Send that emotion to them and then send that knowingness that it’s going to be okay. And the reason you can say that is because you’re here now. You’re so much older and wiser. You survived. Easy. Well, not easy, but you survived. You used all your resources and you survived. You’re here now. So send that knowingness that it’s okay. Because this too will pass. And then as you do that, imagine above you there’s a wonderful resource of love, light and healing. Who. However you imagine it, you imagine it, I imagine it a like a whirlwind, gentle whirlwind that comes through the top of your head and fills your body with all those resources of love, light and healing. Love, light and healing. And as it fills your whole body, all the way down to your tips of your toes and all the way up to your unconscious nose, exactly what to do and allow it to come over your heart, out of your heart and into them. And as you send all that love, light and healing from the multiverse universe, the akashic field, wherever you believe, it fills them up through you. You are the conduit for all of this, because this is you. And as you do that, see them, notice them coming closer to you. You could hold out your hands. Imagine holding out your hands and pulling them into you. And as you pull them into you, they can now inside you grow ins size and age all the way back, all the way up to your current age. So you become, then just notice it, feel the energy. You become them, they become you. Because it’s your turn now to start living your life with all your skills, have access to all your skills, emotions, learnings, all the positive, wonderful emotions that you have, all those experiences that you’ve learned from. So they become you at your current age. Now you, they are you now completely 100% your current age. All cells, fibers, muscles, everything is just you. That’s right. And then just, well, thank you. Thank them. Thank your unconscious mind. And just wonder for a moment, having access to everything you’ve learn, all the positive emotions, all the skills, just wonder how good life is going to be now this or something better. And then open your eyes, come back to me. So that’s it.
Personal Development Unplugged helps you let go of negative beliefs
That was so gentle. Isn’t it such a gentle process. We didn’t go anywhere. We didn’t go into the past. We didn’t access anything at all. We have just, we’ve framed things, I guess, and just opened up access to all your skills. Now I’m gonna say 100%. Remember, I’m a therapist, Not  Your therapist. And if you even now feel, having done that exercise, that there’s still stuff to do, there’s a number of things you can do. My initial reaction would be to, as I say, go and see a therapist, someone who does nlp, timeline therapy, master hypnosis, one to one. And, do that. You could keep asking questions. Make sure you ask that therapist questions. Ask yourself questions as well. What am I doing that if I stopped doing what allow this situation to spare or what am I not doing that if I started doing will allow this situation to disappear and intuitively take action. And if you want, you can always send me an email. feedback@personaldevelopmentuplugged.com and just say, there is this other emotion. It hasn’t quite gone paul, can you help me? And I’ll come up with a process. We’ll do something together. We’ll do something. And everyone else will get the benefit as well. You see, this is a lovely, gentle process. I do it so many times with myself when I get a feeling, because I just know this sense of a younger me that’s been working so hard. And I want. Just want to allow it to become me with access to everything I’ve learned and then create the life that I want to create for me and others around me. Yeah. I hope I’ve made perfect sense. Not perfect sense, but I’ve made sense. And, this has helped because this is what I’m here for. I want to help you let go of issues, negative emotions, limiting beliefs, be able to access all the wonderful positive things you’ve got and then use them in the future using all processes of NLP within hypnosis, timeline therapy, and anything else I’ve discovered or made up. So that’s why I asked you to let me know if there’s anything that I said which, which was not understandable, if that’s the word, maybe I didn’t communicate in the right way. Do let me know as well. Can I make amends for it? Because I want to improve with every episode that we do here. Or I do here. I want to get a little bit better every time. And, the only way I can do that is through my being, or may being, being critical on myself, but also with help from yourself, which would be nice. And because of that, I wanted to make this wonderful offer to you. I want to offer the ability to you to share this episode to everyone you know. And on top of that, as a bonus, you could subscribe to this, follow this podcast. Yeah. I’m so kind, aren’t I? So kind. I hope you enjoyed that. I hope these little things I get just make such a difference in your life. And it’s amazing how the small little things, the subtle things make massive changes. Massive, super, wonderful changes. So just imagine how you want to be. Because if you don’t know the resources you need, just imagine how you want to be instead of the issue you have. And then list, list what resources, what skills are I using? Right. Then what emotions, what positive belief is, is support me. And then we’ll look at a process to incorporate it. There you go. Have more fun than you can stand. Enjoy every heartbeat. Wallow in the sense of everything’s okay. I’ve got this because I’m me. And wherever I think I am, I can know that I’m always more than that. You go enjoy. Until the next time, my friend. It’s Paul from Personal Development Unplugged. Wishing you so much wonderful stuff in the future. Now I’m getting sopy, so I’m gonna go have fun, share, subscribe, and all that stuff. I’ll see you soon. Okay, bye. Warning, you are now leaving the unplugged mind of Paul Clough. It’s time to fly on your own. Be brave, my friend. Personal Development Unplugged.